Ranking: Dark Phoenix

This is the second time Marvel has made a film version of Dark Phoenix, the greatest X-Men saga of all time. The first attempt was X-Men 3: Last Stand, which was an awful movie, overloaded with pointless special effects and actors phoning in their performances, and culminating in a visually impressive but logically dubious fight scene in San Francisco Bay. This attempt is better than that one, although still not a great movie. I've ranked it Okay.

On a mission to save the space shuttle, X-Man Marvel Girl (civilian identity: Jean Grey) is exposed to a weird cosmic force which her body absorbs, the Phoenix Force. This gives her access to a cosmic level of power, but due to her traumatic past, Jean isn't mentally stable enough to handle it. Fearing her own abilities, Jean flees the X-Mansion and returns to her childhood home, where her father is not especially happy to see her again. When the X-Men come and try to persuade Jean to return with them, things soon escalate into a physical confrontation where Jean accidentally kills teammate Raven. Now on the run and convinced that even her closest friends are against her, Jean is vulnerable to persuasion by the bad guys, members of a shape-shifting alien race called the D'Bari, who wish to take the Phoenix Force for themselves.

I think the biggest problem here is that in the comics, the main villains for the Dark Phoenix saga are the Hellfire Club, a sort of Victorian social club of rich and powerful members, each of whom also happens to be an evil mutant. They're a pretty awesome group of villains, but the X-Men films already used them, in the X-Men: First Class movie. This movie uses instead the D'Bari, who are pretty generic. I found it difficult to find the D'Bari a real menace, or compelling in any way when they were on screen. Do the X-Men manage to defeat them and save Jean at the end? Probably, since there's no reason to think the D'Bari are sticking around.

I have previously ranked Ant-Man and the Wasp, Aquaman, Avengers: Endgame, Avengers: Infinity War, the Avengers movies, the Batman movies, Black Panther, Captain America: Civil War, Captain Marvel, Dr. Strange, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Logan, Man of Steel, the Man-Thing, the non-Marvel and non-DC comic movies, the other DC movies, the Spider-Man movies, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, the summer 2015 comic movies, the Superman movies, Thor: Ragnarok, Wonder Woman, and the X-Men movies.


As ever, my ranking system is
Green=excellent  Blue=pretty good  Black=Okay  Red=avoid
_______________________________________________________________________________

Here's the master list of all comics movies I've rated so far, in order from best to worst:

Crumb
American Splendor
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
Iron Man
Heavy Metal (1981)
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
Avengers
Superman (1978)
Captain America
Wonder Woman (2017)
Batman Begins (2005)
Captain America: Civil War
Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier
Avengers: Endgame
Spider-Man (2002)
Aquaman
X-Men 2: X-Men United
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Superman II
Batman (1989)
Ant-Man
Ant-Man and the Wasp
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Dr. Strange
The Dark Knight (2008)
Logan (2017)
Iron Man 3
The Wolverine (2013)
Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Sin City (2005)
X-Men: First Class
X-Men (2000)
Captain Marvel
Black Panther
Man of Steel (2013)
Avengers: Infinity War
Avengers 2: Age of Ultron
Swamp Thing (1982)
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Iron Man 2
Watchmen (2009)
Batman Forever (1995)
Superman Returns (2006)
Thor 2: The Dark World
Dark Phoenix
Incredible Hulk (2008)
Mystery Men (1999)
Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Man-Thing (2005)
Superman III
Supergirl (1984)
Thor
X-Men 3: Last Stand
Hulk (2003)
Fritz the Cat (1972)
Batman and Robin (1997)
Batman Returns (1992)
Superman IV

Amazing Spider-Man (2012) (Haven't seen)
Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) (Haven't seen)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) (Haven't seen)
Batman (1966) (Haven't seen)
Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (Haven't seen)
Catwoman (Haven't seen)
Constantine (Haven't seen)
Deadpool (Haven't seen)
Green Lantern (Haven't seen)
Hellboy (Haven't seen)
Judge Dredd (Haven't seen)
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (2014) (Haven't seen)
V for Vendetta (Haven't seen)
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (Haven't seen)

What I'm Reading: This Is Not a Love Scene

What a treat, a book by my fellow Writers of Chantilly writer, S.C. Megale! This Is Not a Love Scene is Megale's first published novel, although she's well known at the writer's group table for a number of books she's read to us over several years, each done with passion and skill. Unlike most of what I've read from her before, which tended toward fantasy or science fiction, this novel is realistic and set in the contemporary era. It follows Maeve, an 18-year old senior in high school who is taking a film class and hopes to enroll the following year at UCLA in film. She's fallen in love, or at least lust, with the school's top actor, Cole Stone, who is tall and good-looking, and has come up with a film project for her class involving Cole for possibly mixed reasons. And, oh yes, Maeve is in a wheelchair with a degenerative spinal disease for which there's no cure.

Maeve has a disappointing dating history--boys who go out with her to be nice, but have no intention of becoming more involved with her. A succession of guys who are "just...not able to go there." Cole is different. He's hard to read--teasing, alternating between flirtatious and distant, often monosyllabic. But he also seems to have a real romantic interest in Maeve, and over a series of awkward (but funny!) dates and encounters, they gradually learn how to translate their mutual sexual desire into physical affection.

Maeve also has a close group of friends to help her out--BFF Mags, who's pretty and romantically experienced and unfortunately currently dating Nate, who resents the attention Maeve gets from his girlfriend; Elliott and KC, two fellow students in her film class; Quinten, an older man and retired FBI agent who lives at a local nursing home; and of course Francois, her faithful service dog.

Together, the friends help Maeve navigate the myriad adventures of an active, lusty, wheelchair-bound teenage girl--filming a fifteen-minute film project that requires multiple on-location shots, confronting the pushy local director of a special-needs camp who seems to think Maeve owes her involvement, acquiring the unusually delicious ice cream at a local store that was built before handicapped-accessible laws.

In the end, though, it's Maeve who has to help one of her friends in a dangerous situation when no one else can. Will she survive? Will she get accepted to UCLA so she can pursue her dream of directing movies? And most importantly, will she get laid by Cole Stone?

Ranking: Avengers: Endgame

I've now seen Avengers: Endgame twice. It is the second part (not a sequel) of last year's Avengers: Infinity War (which I reviewed here). It is the culmination not only of the two-part Avengers movie, but also of the entire 22-movie Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU), which has been building to this point since Iron Man in 2009.

At the end of Avengers: Infinity War, cosmic bad guy Thanos had assembled the all-powerful Infinity Gauntlet, with its six power gems that have played a role in so many previous Marvel movies. Using the Gauntlet, he snapped his fingers and wiped out half of all life in the universe in one moment, including half of our heroes. Near the beginning of this movie, the narrative advances five years and we see how our remaining heroes and other characters are coping with their incredible losses. The answer: some better than others, but on the whole, not well.

When a freak accident causes Ant-Man to return from the quantum realm, where he's been stuck since the end of his movie from last summer, set just before Thanos's finger snap, he realizes that five years on earth was only about five hours for him. Time works differently in the quantum realm, and after describing his experiences to Tony Stark and Bruce Banner, our heroes theorize it might be possible to manipulate entrances and exits from the quantum realm to travel through time. That is, it might be possible to go back before Thanos assembled the power gems and rewrite history. Whether that works out or not, I will not reveal

I found Avengers: Endgame to be highly satisfying--not quite Excellent on my rankings list, but near the top of the Pretty Good movies. It's amazing how much the screenwriters and directors were able to put in--practically every character in the MCU has at least one meaningful scene--including some characters you may have nearly forgotten about--and yet it doesn't feel particularly over-stuffed. Thor and Hulk especially had some really fun character-building scenes. I'm not quite sure I can recommend it to everybody--if you haven't seen any previous Marvel movies, you have some serious homework to do before taking this one on. But for those already familiar with the MCU (you don't have to have seen every movie to date), this is a really fun movie.

I have previously ranked Ant-Man and the Wasp, Aquaman, Avengers: Infinity War, the Avengers movies, the Batman movies, Black Panther, Captain America: Civil War, Captain Marvel, Dr. Strange, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Logan, Man of Steel, the Man-Thing, the non-Marvel and non-DC comic movies, the other DC movies, the Spider-Man movies, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, the summer 2015 comic movies, the Superman movies, Thor: Ragnarok, Wonder Woman, and the X-Men movies.


As ever, my ranking system is
Green=excellent  Blue=pretty good  Black=Okay  Red=avoid
_______________________________________________________________________________

Here's the master list of all comics movies I've rated so far, in order from best to worst:

Crumb
American Splendor
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
Iron Man
Heavy Metal (1981)
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
Avengers
Superman (1978)
Captain America
Wonder Woman (2017)
Batman Begins (2005)
Captain America: Civil War
Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier
Avengers: Endgame
Spider-Man (2002)
Aquaman
X-Men 2: X-Men United
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Superman II
Batman (1989)
Ant-Man
Ant-Man and the Wasp
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Dr. Strange
The Dark Knight (2008)
Logan (2017)
Iron Man 3
The Wolverine (2013)
Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Sin City (2005)
X-Men: First Class
X-Men (2000)
Captain Marvel
Black Panther
Man of Steel (2013)
Avengers: Infinity War
Avengers 2: Age of Ultron
Swamp Thing (1982)
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Iron Man 2
Watchmen (2009)
Batman Forever (1995)
Superman Returns (2006)
Thor 2: The Dark World
Incredible Hulk (2008)
Mystery Men (1999)
Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Man-Thing (2005)
Superman III
Supergirl (1984)
Thor
X-Men 3: Last Stand
Hulk (2003)
Fritz the Cat (1972)
Batman and Robin (1997)
Batman Returns (1992)
Superman IV

Amazing Spider-Man (2012) (Haven't seen)
Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) (Haven't seen)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) (Haven't seen)
Batman (1966) (Haven't seen)
Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (Haven't seen)
Catwoman (Haven't seen)
Constantine (Haven't seen)
Deadpool (Haven't seen)
Green Lantern (Haven't seen)
Hellboy (Haven't seen)
Judge Dredd (Haven't seen)
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (2014) (Haven't seen)
V for Vendetta (Haven't seen)

X-Men Origins: Wolverine (Haven't seen)

What I'm Reading: Medieval Cities: Their Origins and the Revival of Trade

Medieval Cities, by French professor Henri Pirenne, was published in 1952 but is the synthesis and culmination of lectures he had been building on since the 1920s. I believe Dr. Pirenne was the one who came up with the theory that it was not the fall of the western Empire after Rome was sacked in 470 that caused the decline of urban civilization in western Europe. He believe the Ostrogoths and Visigoths who took over from the Romans largely left the old economic structures in place. They didn't want to destroy the Roman empire, they wanted to share in its prosperity, and in fact, did so.

Rather, it was the spread of Islam across north Africa in the eighth century that disrupted the ancient trade routes, cut western Europe off from its grain and luxury sources, and caused the real "fall" of the old Roman empire (in the west). It was in the eighth and ninth centuries (not 200 years earlier) that trade ebbed to almost nothing and economies, such as they were, became dominated by a feudal system where great lords ruled over estates and everything the people lived on, rich or poor, was produced locally on those estates.

I believe attributing the decline to the spread of Islam is fairly standard now in medieval studies, but at the time it was revolutionary. Dr. Pirenne builds up quite a convincing argument, even if he's a bit breezy with the evidence at times. Moreover, that's just the first couple chapters. In the rest of the book, he continues the story of the re-sparking of urban life in the tenth and eleventh centuries, after the threats from the Vikings and other barbarian invaders had receded. He traces the origins of merchants, the middle class, market towns, and medieval economic institutions in, initially, the Netherlands and northern Italy, and spreading during the High Middle Ages into England, France, and Germany. He explains his particular view that for security purposes, the new trading centers developed at first as suburbs of the episcopal and political centers of the feudal age, but gradually supplanted them in population and wealth.

This book was right up my alley, with some of my favorite subjects--cities and European history--and told in a grand sweep by an author who seems to know everything possible about the topic. There are interesting observations or opinions on practically every page. Of course, it's an academic work written in an elevated style, but for those who share my particular fascinations, I highly recommend this classic work of history.

What I'm Reading: Roundup

Let's do some of the books I've been reading lately, hitting the comics this time.

Diary of an Awesome Friendly Kid The latest in the long Diary of a Wimpy Kid series by Jeff Kinney, about a middle-schooler named Greg who keeps a journal. My kids love this series--if we don't have all of them, we're pretty close. And I've been known to pick up copies left around the house and giggle my way through big chunks of them. Greg is always getting himself into ridiculous situations, usually because he tries to find the easy way out of a chore or homework assignment or a quick way to make money, only to find his shortcut has backfired on him.

This is the latest one, and is a little different than the others in that it's supposed to be written by Greg's best friend, Rowley. Rowley's a smart student in school, but not so much when it comes to reading other people--he always believes they have the best of intentions, and others, especially Greg, are always getting the better of him. I don't think this book worked quite as well as the books from Greg's point of view. In those books, we know what Greg's thinking, and he comes across as sympathetic. Here, he mainly comes across as manipulative, always trying to take advantage of his friendship with Rowley to get Rowley to do his homework or take the fall in their latest misadventure. Still, there were several funny scenes. If I were to recommend a book in this series, though, I think it would be The Long Haul, when Greg's family goes on vacation. Diary of an Awesome Friendly Kid would probably be near the bottom of the list.

Batman in the Forties A collection of Batman stories from the 1940s (duh). Part of a series of Batman decades--the seventies one is probably the one I'll get next, if I do get another. It's amazing to me how much more readable stories from Batman's first decade are than various Batman stories I've read from the 1950s. The Comics Code, imposed in 1954, really did a number on the comics industry--just ripping the heart out of depictions of evil, and thus, adulterating the heroism of the protagonists as well. Here, even though these stories are aimed at kids or early teens, there's no shortage of gruesome murders and ruthless gangsters, plus those great macabre Batman villains. The introduction of Robin (from Batman #38) is surprisingly violent. It's easy to see why kids loved this!

The early Catwoman story titled Your Face Is Your Fortune (because Catwoman has disguised herself as a beautician to rob high society women) is probably the best one here, with Alfred, Armchair Detective, a close second. Lots of other good stuff too, though.

Detective Comics #1000 The anniversary issue, just out last month! Not a book in format, as it's the regular "floppy" comic style, but thick enough to be a book with 96 pages. Also, I feel compelled to point out, it's not really a Batman anniversary, as he didn't appear in this title until issue #27. No matter, it's the title he's been associated with since 1939.

I also picked up Action Comics #1000 a few months ago and found a few good stories, but a lot of filler, too. Not 'Tec #1000. Nearly every story in here is solid, with some great creative teams at work. I'm not normally a fan of writer Brian Michael Bendis, but I think his contribution was the best, with an elderly Penguin, who we learn has known Batman's secret identity for decades, using this knowledge for a final act of revenge against the frail, wheel-chair bound Bruce Wayne. However, Bruce Wayne still has a final counter-stratagem of his own....

Another good one was Batman's Longest Case, by Scott Snyder, about a case Batman has been following for years. Whenever he gets some free time, he'll work on the latest clue, which inevitably leads him to some exotic new location--an archeological dig in Egypt, a plane wreck in the Amazon--until finally leading him back to an abandoned tenement house in Gotham, where he discovers the source of the clues is....but that would be spoiling it.

A highly satisfying anniversary issue, entirely worthy of the Dark Knight.

Ranking: Captain Marvel

A few weeks ago while visiting Nashville, my family went to see Captain Marvel. In the comics Captain Marvel, alter ego Carol Danvers, is a character I don't follow too much, but I think the movie kept pretty close to her character. She starts the movie off as a warrior of the Kree, a fierce warrior alien race that are humanoid but with blue skin (although Captain Marvel looks perfectly human). Captain Marvel herself, known as Vers to her Kree companions, is superstrong and can direct energy blasts. On a mission to Earth to track an escaped Skrull, an alien race who are the enemies of the Kree, she starts to have human memories. During her time on Earth, more and more memories return to her, and she gradually realizes she actually is human, and that the incident that took her memory gave her her superhuman powers.

One big difference between the comics and the movie I did notice was (spoiler alert!) in the comics, the Kree and the Skrulls have been at war with each other for centuries. Both sides I think are seen as the bad guys, but the Kree are maybe seen as more a civilization whose morals have decayed from fighting for so long, while the shape-shifting, but in their natural form, green-skinned, Skrulls are considered definitely and inherently evil. In the movie, however, it is the Kree who turn out to be truly evil, with the Skrulls, at least the group we meet, being misunderstood victims.

This was a fun and highly watchable movie but not earth-shattering, so I'm putting it near the top of the Okay category.

I have previously ranked Ant-Man and the Wasp, Aquaman, Avengers: Infinity War, the Avengers movies, the Batman movies, Black Panther, Captain America: Civil War, Dr. Strange, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Logan, Man of Steel, the Man-Thing, the non-Marvel and non-DC comic movies, the other DC movies, the Spider-Man movies, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, the summer 2015 comic movies, the Superman movies, Thor: Ragnarok, Wonder Woman, and the X-Men movies.


As ever, my ranking system is
Green=excellent  Blue=pretty good  Black=Okay  Red=avoid
_______________________________________________________________________________

Here's the master list of all comics movies I've rated so far, in order from best to worst:

Crumb
American Splendor
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
Iron Man
Heavy Metal (1981)
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
Avengers
Superman (1978)
Captain America
Wonder Woman (2017)
Batman Begins (2005)
Captain America: Civil War
Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier
Spider-Man (2002)
Aquaman
X-Men 2: X-Men United
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Superman II
Batman (1989)
Ant-Man
Ant-Man and the Wasp
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Dr. Strange
The Dark Knight (2008)
Logan (2017)
Iron Man 3
The Wolverine (2013)
Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Sin City (2005)
X-Men: First Class
X-Men (2000)
Captain Marvel
Black Panther
Man of Steel (2013)
Avengers: Infinity War
Avengers 2: Age of Ultron
Swamp Thing (1982)
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Iron Man 2
Watchmen (2009)
Batman Forever (1995)
Superman Returns (2006)
Thor 2: The Dark World
Incredible Hulk (2008)
Mystery Men (1999)
Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Man-Thing (2005)
Superman III
Supergirl (1984)
Thor
X-Men 3: Last Stand
Hulk (2003)
Fritz the Cat (1972)
Batman and Robin (1997)
Batman Returns (1992)
Superman IV

Amazing Spider-Man (2012) (Haven't seen)
Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) (Haven't seen)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) (Haven't seen)
Batman (1966) (Haven't seen)
Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (Haven't seen)
Catwoman (Haven't seen)
Constantine (Haven't seen)
Deadpool (Haven't seen)
Green Lantern (Haven't seen)
Hellboy (Haven't seen)
Judge Dredd (Haven't seen)
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (2014) (Haven't seen)
V for Vendetta (Haven't seen)

X-Men Origins: Wolverine (Haven't seen)

Ranking: Ant-Man and the Wasp

Missed Ant-Man and the Wasp in the theaters, so I watched it with my family at home a few weeks ago. (I reviewed the original Ant-Man back in 2015 here.) In it, we revisit Scott Lang, who is now under year-long house arrest following the events in the first movie, with his parole officer Randall Park eager to catch him breaking the rules so he can send him to prison for a long time. Throughout the movie, various complications come up with inventor Hank Pym and his daughter Hope van Dyne, who Scott is kind of in love with, that require Scott to leave the house in the Ant-Man costume, only to try to rush back to the house before Randall can notice his absence.

Of course, Ant-Man can get small and talk to ants (and so can Hope Van Dyne, in her own costume as the Wasp), and back in Captain America: Civil War, we also learned he can reverse the sizing process to get really big. The movie also introduces Bill Foster, an African-American inventor who was once partners with Hank Pym before they had a falling out. (Comics fans know that Bill Foster is the alter-ego of hero Goliath.) Though he's not himself evil, Bill Foster has allied himself with the movie's main villain, Ghost, who can alter her body's molecular structure and walk through walls or any other object, solidifying parts of her body--say, her fist--to pummel an enemy. But she doesn't have total control of her abilities and is slowly disintegrating, something Bill Foster is trying to help her avoid.

So I'm not sure I have a lot to say about it, except it was a fun movie! Fast-paced, funny, kids enjoyed it. I put it in the Pretty Good category, ranked right about where the original was.

I have previously ranked Aquaman, Avengers: Infinity War, the Avengers movies, the Batman movies, Black Panther, Captain America: Civil War, Dr. Strange, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Logan, Man of Steel, the Man-Thing, the non-Marvel and non-DC comic movies, the other DC movies, the Spider-Man movies, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, the summer 2015 comic movies, the Superman movies, Thor: Ragnarok, Wonder Woman, and the X-Men movies.


As ever, my ranking system is
Green=excellent  Blue=pretty good  Black=Okay  Red=avoid

_______________________________________________________________________________

Here's the master list of all comics movies I've rated so far, in order from best to worst:

Crumb
American Splendor
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse
Iron Man
Heavy Metal (1981)
Spider-Man 2 (2004)
Avengers
Superman (1978)
Captain America
Wonder Woman (2017)
Batman Begins (2005)
Captain America: Civil War
Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier
Spider-Man (2002)
Aquaman
X-Men 2: X-Men United
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Superman II
Batman (1989)
Ant-Man
Ant-Man and the Wasp
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Dr. Strange
The Dark Knight (2008)
Logan (2017)
Iron Man 3
The Wolverine (2013)
Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Sin City (2005)
X-Men: First Class
X-Men (2000)
Black Panther
Man of Steel (2013)
Avengers: Infinity War
Avengers 2: Age of Ultron
Swamp Thing (1982)
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Iron Man 2
Watchmen (2009)
Batman Forever (1995)
Superman Returns (2006)
Thor 2: The Dark World
Incredible Hulk (2008)
Mystery Men (1999)
Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Man-Thing (2005)
Superman III
Supergirl (1984)
Thor
X-Men 3: Last Stand
Hulk (2003)
Fritz the Cat (1972)
Batman and Robin (1997)
Batman Returns (1992)
Superman IV

Amazing Spider-Man (2012) (Haven't seen)
Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) (Haven't seen)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) (Haven't seen)
Batman (1966) (Haven't seen)
Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (Haven't seen)
Catwoman (Haven't seen)
Constantine (Haven't seen)
Deadpool (Haven't seen)
Green Lantern (Haven't seen)
Hellboy (Haven't seen)
Judge Dredd (Haven't seen)
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (2014) (Haven't seen)
V for Vendetta (Haven't seen)
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (Haven't seen)